I’ve been waking up to a ringing doorbell these past few weeks now and I miss the noise of those busy morning chores that no longer exist. Although everybody outside is rushed, my thoughts are hushed. I know the whole world is singing right now, but today I’ll be that petty little girl who whines every time someone offers her a candy. Sure I would get a lot of hate for that, but at least I am alone.
Innocent as I was, I used to think that when I grew bigger, the house I lived in will get smaller. Turns out it is the opposite. As it is the least favorite morning routine of mine, everyday I dragged myself across this huge empty house to a morning newspaper and asked myself why? I don’t read them, but a pile of untouched newspapers will certainly draw a lot of attention I don’t want.
Last night I overheard people are talking of how I died last summer and sure it feels like it, but I didn’t. The neighbors have finally put the lights out as I turned down the bill last week. I don’t care how bright the day is, today I wont let the sun comes in. I know life is not a competition nor it is a race, but clearly right now I’m not winning.
The Loudest Backyard 